Sunday, November 17, 2019

Sergio Goyri's Thirst for Vengeance.

Sergio Goyri is a vampire. It seems like an odd thing to say, huh? Had anyone told me that a while back, I’m not sure what the hell people would've been talking about, but now that I have seen it with my own 2 eyes, I believe it. Fuck.


Symphony No. 11 in G Minor, The Year 1905: Eternal Memory plays as the opening credits roll & then we catch a glimpse of  a very spooky mansion at night where a vampire named Dracul (Sergio Goyri) shows off his fangs and is ready to attack an enemy of his! In the present time, a dying woman tells her son Luis of the time when his father had destroyed the vampire Dracul, but now she fears he will return and that Luis must destroy the “Cruz De Roble” in order for the vampire to never return from the dead again. After Luis’ mom passes away, He, his wife & their friends head out to his family’s old mansion and of course that is when things get terrifying & spooky! Dracul is resurrected by the help of his ghoulish partner “Igor” and goes around town killing people & drinking their blood. Dracul is back from the dead (again) and is thirsty for blood more than ever. Vengeance as well of course.



 Who would of thought a vampire movie with Sergio Goyri would thrill me so much. I mean then again, I do love me some vampires and as for Goyri... Uhhh... Well... Let’s not talk about him. Let’s just talk about Sed De Venganza (aka "Thirst for Vengeance")! What a movie! As simple as it is, it is a very entertaining movie for sure. It’s one of those movies you really have to watch at night because it’s mainly set at night and the only good way to watch a movie like that is when it’s nighttime of course. The movie is always dark, full of fog machines blowing all over, rubber bats flying around on strings and Sergio Goyri wears the perfect vampire costume. Fangs & cape & everything! Ahh! There’s also a “ghost” carriage as well which adds more of a spooky aesthetic. There’s also a big golden bat crest above where Dracul rests and it is incredibly fucking awesome.

 When you watch Sed De Venganza, it honestly feels like a movie that should of been made before the 1980’s and perhaps that was the intention. It was either a homage to the old horror movies or it’s just an old screenplay given life later on in the 80’s. The screenplay was written by Ramón Obon, Ramón is a legendary screenwriter who has written so many wonderful movies and a lot of his well-known ones are his horror movies, such as: Pánico, El Imperio De Dracula, Pacto Diabólico & Santo Contra Las Lobas. Ramón Obon it seems here was intending to make his own Dracula movie or perhaps even remake it (rip it off), but of course he changed it up so it makes sense to be set in present time Mexico. Can we call this movie one of the best Dracula rip-offs ever? Maybe not the best, but it's definitely a good one for sure. I also adore how they shortened the vampire's name to "Dracul". Kinda reminds me of my "name" after all. Wonderful. Creative (nah).


 Sed De Venganza is a fun as hell Dracula cheapie rip-off that was written by a legend. I’m ecstatic to add this to the permanent collection and look forward to watching it again & again & again. Dracul forever.




























Thursday, November 7, 2019

The Little Big Surprise.

On the weekend before Halloween, I went to Riverside to acquire some tapes in person. I went to the seller’s house and he showed me what else he had & I picked out some cool trashy Mexican titles and saw he also had some Spanish XXX titles as well. They were all very bizarre of course but one caught my attention for its unusual & humorous cover. “La Sorpresa” (The Surprise) is the title of this movie and the seller told me “she’s actually a he”, meaning the “sorpresa” is this woman on the cover is really a man. I thought that was so fucking funny but didn't end up buying the movie then. Later on that day, I kept thinking about La Sorpresa and my curiousty convinced me enough to message the seller to ship out to me. I then finally gotten La Sorpresa in my hands and it was definitely a little big surprise for me. That was supposed to be a pun by the way, but not a very funny one of course.


 In La Sorpresa, a music producer named Carlos (also credited as “Carlitos”) has been drinking hard because he's remembering some very regretful things he’s done lately. These things have been bothering him so much, he tells himself he needs to stop drinking and that his mom would tell him this kind of shit would happen to him if he consumed copious amounts of alcohol. What are these regretful things he’s done? Well it seem Carlitos fell head over heels on a singer named “Sandra” and fucked her hard twice, then after the second time, she reveals to him that she’s half woman & half man. She reveals her penis to him and Carlitos is in shock. He promises her a recording contract if she doesn’t tell anyone of what has happened. She agrees and I guess from there Sandra went straight to Hollywood & became a music sensation. After all, her acapella cover of Juan Gabriel’s “Se Me Olvido Otra Vez” was good enough for Carlitos & the camera guy. After that “incident”, Carlitos meets with “Jessica” in a cheap motel room and of course he fucks Jessica hard in the ass as the air conditioner cools the room. After ejaculating in Jessica’s face, Jessica runs to the bathroom & rubs her penis. From there, the movie ends with Carlitos saying this was all just a bad dream. Or was it really?


 Obviously a review for this weird ass fuck & trashy porno is out of the ordinary, but how could I not talk about it? After all, the title is so perfect & so fitting for the movie’s gimmick. Carlitos was surprised by the revelation of Sandra’s penis. My only complain of the movie is how we really never know if Carlitos was really just dreaming all of this or was he just very drunk & in denial. Either way, Carlitos is a freak, but I wish him the best wherever he may be. As for Sandra, I hope she’s okay and still singing Juan Gabriel songs.

La Sorpresa for me is trashy & aesthetically significant. A worth looking into. However, I did have to drown out my memories of watching Carlitos’ having sex by eating good Vietnamese fast food, consuming Starbucks coffee & listening to lots of smutty & catchy songs by TV Girl.