Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Magico: Messenger Of The Gods

In 1990, some odd looking Outer Space evil beings came to Mexico to fuck with people & kill them. Luckily, a group of odd looking Outer Space good doers sent a superhero named Magico, El Enviado De Los Dioses to stop these evil beings from harming innocent Mexican people. Magico is a very powerful superhero! He can fly, he can drive a car, he has heat vision, he can sorta fight, and he gives good advice! Wowza!

In the beginning of Magico, the evil doers arrive on Earth and laugh at people at a dance. When a jealous creep sees his tacky girlfriend dancing with a college professor, he attempts to shoot him! Right when the bullet is about to hit the professor, Magico takes his place. Apparently, Magico needed a human body to warp with in order to roam around on Earth (yeah, I don't get it either). After the confusing warping thing with the professor, Magico keeps on eye on Mexico via a computer & globe. When he sees someone is in trouble, he awkwardly teleports there to save the person in need! First, Magico saves a girl from being cut up by a maniac (an evil space woman in disguise). Then, Magico stops a guy from committing suicide and convinces him to not do it again! Then! He saves a group of kids from being sacrificed to the devil!

 Fuck Superman, Magico is cooler!

Magico is pretty crappy. Crappy and very weird! The movie of course was poorly made. You can actually hear the director directing! When Magico is supposed to appear, you can literally hear the director telling the actors in a particular scene to "freeze" so Magico can magically pop in to fight or help. In certain scenes, you can actually hear people in the background talking. It could be the crew, or it could be people walking around the set. Whoever is talking, they sure are loud! Speaking of talking, for some odd reason, certain parts of the movie were dubbed. What's funny about these dubbed scenes is that we can also hear the original sound of the movie. So basically, we hear the dubbing and the original sound together! As for the special effects.... They're not great, that's for sure. I actually like the special effects though but only because they're fun to look at! The flying scenes = Magic(o)al! The acting... Well.... Uuummm.... No comment.

If you plan on getting yourself a copy of Magico, expect to see a very sloppy, cheap & trashy SOV superhero movie that still manages to keep you entertained in the weirdest ways possible. It is definitely worth every penny and worth watching over and over til you pass out. Get it! Get it now! 7/10.

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Angels of Death.

So lately, a bunch of typical 1990's promiscuous Mexican men have been brutally murdered. Who could be committing these brutal murders? Transsexual hooker, perhaps? Nah uh! It's actually two hot chicks. These hot chicks are sisters. These hot chicks are mean and extremely deadly. Vengeful too. You see, when these two chicks were small girls, they witnessed their parents being murdered & these murderers raped the 2 girls afterwards. Now, these sisters are avenging their parent's deaths by murdering a bunch of promiscuous men they find in night clubs. Hopefully a badass cop played by Jorge Reynoso will capture these crazy sisters!

Angeles De La Muerte (aka "Angels of Death") is such a fun movie. It's bloody, funny, sexy, and badass. Patricia Rivera and Diana Ferreti are excellent in this movie. They do a great job playing crazy chicks that kill sleazy men. They both look pretty fucking hot too. Especially Diana. Mmmm... You gotta love her poofy hair & sexy smile! The killings are great. They got enough blood to satisfy a crazed gorehound. Of course, I sorta wish these crazy sisters used other sharp objects instead of knives. The knives tend to get boring after a kill or two. A chainsaw would of been very nice. Machetes too. As usual, the leading man of this Mexican movie is a badass. This badass is Jorge Reynoso. He may be chubby looking in this movie, but he's still strong, badass, and sleeping with an attractive woman. Go Jorge!

As I said before, Angeles De La Muerte is fun. It never gets boring. It is entertaining from start to finish. If you like these kinds of 90's Mexican horror movies and haven't seen this one, then I suggest you look for a copy because I know damn well you will dig the crap out of it. 7/10.

                                                 VHS cover found at El Norte Sleazy Picture Show